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Wednesday 02/08/2012 #995

Shit on My Chest @ Webster Groves

Hash Trash:

So, PMS told me of a couple of different methods for submitting the hash trash. Then I had my complimentary shot of red booze juice at Weber’s and forgot most everything. So, my inaugural voyage into scribing is probably going to be fraught with errors of various kinds.  I hate to admit that Shotbyawhore is officially smarter than I because he thought to take notes during the hash. But that is harder when running.
It was another pleasant enough night in greater Webster Groves, though not as balmy as the previous Wednesday. I believe only Postage and Purdy Mouth decided to wear shorts. Actually, Postage was even topless at one point. First breasts I have seen at a hash since like August or something. 
I am not sure how the hare did it, but he somehow managed to make it feel like we were going downhill three quarters of the time even though we ended up back at the same place. Maybe it was that the Ledge of Death was high enough to compensate for the negative elevation changes at other points. It was not a terribly deathy Ledge of Death, though, and even Gay Blade’s dog probably could have made it. Yet there was some arse pushing to get the last few people up the slope.
The trains were less dramatic this week, since we watched from a beer halt and no one had to decide whether it was wise to go jumping over the tracks rather than wait. There seemed to be two of them passing in the night, but I may have already been too buzzed to tell for certain. We also did not get a visit from Webster’s finest, so that was a little sad. I did hear the day after last Wednesday’s hash that the cops were a little shocked to see the various cranium lamps heading up the hill to Autohaus while they were having a smoke after deciding not to arrest 40 people.
The beer was as promised by the hare. Cheap. Awful. More Stag in one night than in all my previous years combined. The hare also made me realize that people who live on Newport get to have real garages and a cool alley. We don’t get to have nice things like that on Clark. We also got to hang briefly in the part of Webster where people keep goats. I swear…goats. No idea why. I think we were all too lazy to go look at the goats, however, since there would have been another hill to go over.
Pleasant enough little jog from the beer stop back to circle. I am fairly certain PMS wrote 4 new songs in the last week based on the mumbling and lack of knowledge of lyrics on the part of the whole group. I will have nightmares for months about whatever it was Free Mustache Rides had on his head. IHOP’s virgin was apparently ready for a joke, but he pulled his pants down anyway. I think he was just showing off his boxer briefs. Also, Postage is now calling Tig Ol' Bitties Diggity and seems rather stubborn about desisting.  Whiney Bitch was wearing some creepy hoody thing that made me think of Max Von Sydow in “The Seventh Seal.” Shits Bricks managed to do something to DFL himself, and there was much sadness.
Once it came to Hashshit nominations, I think Burn Rubber was falsely accuzated of wearing new shoes, considering how adamantly she protested. She lost most sympathy when she was unable to even remotely finish the seemingly bottomless plunger of Stag and PBR. The pack then swung low after about 20 announcements, and we headed to the on after at Weber’s.
We realized at the on after that Shits Bricks seems to confine his various man crushes to gingers. Postage had a whole bunch of fries stolen. Burn Rubber made up for her horrible down down by having two shots of the free red booze juice at Weber’s.
All and all a good night with not a lot of blood on trail…


1st Annual "Please Shit on my Chest/Cheap Beer Hall of Fame/2nd Wednesday in February/Those Fuck Nuts from Last Week Ran Half My Hash Hash"

You guys pretty much ran the trail that I had planned last week so I will try and change it up a bit.  I was thinking of running it in reverse but finding a bridge of death or hill of death where there is a good chance of someone actually dying.  Also, the cheap beer hall of fame will be strategically placed along the trail.

If you have any questions please ask Google. 

What to expect:
Cheap beer, Tit checks, Walker trail (4 miles no RR crossings), Runner trail (5+ miles), Gang Bangs, Hoarders, Shiggy, Beer halts

What to bring:
Cranium light, Change of shoes and socks, Astro-Glide, Dogs, Cats, Gerbils

Blackburn Park
509 Edgar Rd
Webster Groves, MO 63119


From West/North: Take 270S to 44E. Take 44 to exit 280, Elm Ave.  Turn right onto Elm, left onto Glendale, left onto Edgar.  Go right into the park.  Look for hashers.

From South: Take 270N and follow the directions for West/North.

From IL/City: From Illinois, get into St. Louis via 40. Take 55S to 44W.  Take 44W to the Elm exit, make a left. Make another left onto Glendale, left onto Edgar. Go right into the park.  Look for hashers.

Map Link:

View Larger Map

Webers Front Row
8169 Big Bend Blvd
Webster Groves, MO 63119

Big Hump Hash House Harriers - St. Louis, Missouri - Established 1999