Lost in the fog
Did I ever tell you the Meta Arsehole philosophy of life? “Life is a series of tradeoffs.” And so it was Wednesday. While the thick fog apparently was the reason we only had half our usual assortment of half minds the ones that did manage to find the start were rendered invisible to the roving gangs and potential drive by shootings of North County.
Our fearless co-hares Disco Ass and Strap On (clap clap) Strap Off pre-laid trail which afforded us additional safety in numbers. Once the substitute, substitute, substitute RA finished circle the group split into eagle, turkey and walker packs. Of course Whiney didn’t decide to put his shiggy shoes on until we were away and as a result of the fog couldn’t see the eagle pack. At least that’s what he claimed. Personally I think he just wanted to hang with the walkers.
On the eagle trail the pack was subjected to TP marks interspersed with snow, trash bags and random garbage. Luckily Disco was there to direct them into the open sewer thinly covered with two inches of ice. While they tried to see how many could contract urinary tract infections they eventually did find their way out to the land of shoe sucking mud. I heard stories about a tunnel somewhere on trail. I think it was at this point they lost track of 2F Canuck. Apparently they don’t have tunnels in Canadia.
Well they did finally find the beer stop. In addition to the required beer the hares thoughtfully provided a rat infested couch and non working TV. Gee thanks! After they wore poor Famous out with their threesome; Bama, Famous and their virgin drove up happy to have a beer and a cigarette. Just Kelley tried to get into the act by using the ever popular pick up line “You look pretty damn hot for white trash” on Seize Her Salad. Results were not available at press time.
We decided to cranium back to the start. Whiney took several of the pack on a non sanctioned extended trail because he said he needed more miles all the while neglecting to tell the others he never ran the first part. Once back at the starting parking lot we were happily reunited with 2FC and every one sang Oh Canada in his honor. The culmination of circle was the awarding of hash shit to Haley’s Comet for losing shoes AND socks in the shoe sucking mud. Circle broke up and any stories from the on after are going to have to be made up by someone else.
All in all just another shitty trail!