The night started in the secluded Bowood Farms on the bleeding north edge of the
Boulevard Wheat Keg (2fc) finished his costume at 7:05pm and walked to the hash but didn’t realize he was volunteering to write his first hash trash ever by wearing his beer on his head. Canadia was also well represented by Dapper Sapper’s Well-Endowed Ghost (Postage Tramp) and purported sightings of Dapper’s pornstache on Joe the Plumber (Sexorcist).
Ricky’s Crab Shack pulled his mask off long enough to show Just Kristen and Just Stephanie how to do a proper down down while they nervously waited for their sponsor, Jack Amy Rabbitt Winehouse Slim to cum and hash. Ghoul king Lock Nut Monster and his eerie queen Full Service Ass Station scared the pack with a 3+ mile pub crawl but then won the pack over by claiming 4, did they say 4, beer stops and telling the pack to bring cash & ID. As always, the Tabletop Christmas Tree (PMS) then asked “Do we need ID on trail?”
The trail went through the CWE hood, flirted with Delmar and
Half the pack made an impromptu beer stop at Studio 34 before arriving just in time for a free beer war. Cum It Out, taking offence to copious amounts of beer being poured on his green cranium by Jump My FMP Bones and her co-conspirators (KegBoy and AutoWitch), retaliated in force spewing beer over the pack before referee Help Me, I’m Wet called a penalty and sent the pack On In.
At circle, the hares were let off the hook for only having three official beer stops given all were paid for! FRBs and all midgets were brought in for Sally in the Alley. Best costumes were awarded to Dominatrix G-Spot (a new age superhero–Really! Thinking we would believe a tight rubber costume = superhero. I mean REALLY!) and yellow homemade speed skating suit wearing Gay Blades of Glory, who was aptly named at the on after. Wear it loudly and proudly sister–I mean brother!
B is for Burning Guy Fawkes Asshole decided to defer the insignificant runs until next week–“Remember the 5th of November.” Until then, congratulations to SOSO, Joe the Plumber/Mario, Red-Faced Pink Slip, Tabletop Christmas Tree, Dapper Sapper’s Ghost, IHAD, Fartfignugen, 5 Doubloons ^3, Elbow Deep, Do My Gypsy Bellydancing Butt, and Boulevard Wheat Keg.
The virgins Just Stephanie and Just Kristen proceeded to flash their young hidden beautiful buoyant body parts–still not sure how so many of you heard a joke and then a song??? OCD, having already eaten out of my hand, decided to overcome fears by feeling what was under GladHeAteHer’s roman kilt–oops–I mean our RA decided to feel up Dapper Sapper’s Ghost and was surprised by the current exchange rate on imported ghost meat. Having imbibed freely from the plenteous hash beer and obviously concerned about the strong exchange rate, GladHeAterHer then proceeded to award himself the hash shit and swing low.
Most of the pack moved to Tom’s–no–I mean Culpeppers to continue the party.
PMS’s Dewey Sexual Purse, Celery the Pink Witch from BFE, Indiana Ashley Jones, Amy JRS Winehouse, and Jump My FMP Bones started a catfight to tap 2fc’s keg before destroying his label during their keg stands. PMS’s Dewey Sexual Purse then blessed Long Duck Donger Malfunction’s 50-run cranium band.
Just Brad was then acclaimed as the new Gay Blade’s of Glory and, passing on rumours of Jack in the Box antics and multiple hurls following the Red Dress Run, Marky Mark was named Hymen Hunter–hitting on your virgin cousin Marky Mark–I mean Really! Hope you were inspired by our
Next year – I’m wearing DMB’s Patchwork Bag cuz it has more friends than DMB and PMS’s purse!