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Wednesday 02/06/2008 #683

Whiney Bitch @ ???

Hash Trash:

2 rivers. Fire. Beaver. Parenthesis. Wienie sticks. Hobos.
Have I sparked your interest yet? Good.
A small group of hashers met in a lovely parking lot (go figure, pavement-pounding-son-of-a ...) in St. Charles, which I, Dewey Sexual System, the scribe, had to cross 2 rivers to get to. 2! Seriously. As I pulled in I was quickly met by So-So, Pornogenic, PMS (hobbling with her broken foot) and Postage Tramp, our long-winded R.A. Whiney Bitch showed up a few minutes later, looking tired and flour-covered. Hmmmm. Further inspection (and photo evidence) led us to believe mud of some kind would be involved. Double Hmmmm. Arabian Moon and Red Face Pink Slip showed up, looking mighty thirsty. Soon, Help Me I'm Wet and the beer arrived, in her own store bought cardboard cooler. Cars slowly pulled in: Do My Butt, Nurse Hashshit and FeFe, Duzzy Cum, ICHY, Lock Nut Monster, and lo and behold, Stiiiiill Just Fuck-ing Tom!
After PMS pointed out there were no virgins or Justs in attendance, but Whiney went ahead with chalk talk anyway. After drawing what looked like a map to buried treasure, he was soon on-out. We consumed beer and chatted with friends, before realizing that we too should be on out. Let's go! We ran through the parking lots that cover St. Charles and Frontier Park. Then we got to run on brick roads, or cobblestone, as DMB called them. After the brick roads came running on wooden slat. Icy ones. Nurse, DMB and Dewey decided to walk. Then we got to run on the street. We were informed in chalk talk that there would be a Turkey Eagle split, so we kept our eyes open for it (we usually run with ours closed) not that we needed to, as 2 were placed side-by-side. Thanks, we really needed that.
So we take the turkey, naturally, seeing as the eagle went through the muddy graveyard. Running along, we see a lone hasher in the distance. Porno decided to brave the turkey by herself, luckily we caught up to her, as she was having trouble seeing the dots in the moonlight. "Why?" one might ask. Because they had become wet and driven over, the same thing Whiney Bitched about a few weeks back at DMB's B-day hash! Hypocrite...
Finally we get to where we think the 2 trails meet up, we see the true-trail arrow and head down the alley. We must be far behind because we see nothing. Then we hear whistles and what sounds like Postage. We need to find trail, quick! Then we see a hasher, we run to meet them, and it's Whiney laying a Hash Halt (not explained in circle) by the true trail arrow. We were acranium! Obviously being faster than us, the hare soon lost us and we were again at the mercy of the trail. Hearing the pack behind us, we were now in a race for FRBs. Luckily, we emerged on the most beautiful of letters: BN. Having been told to look for fire, we headed towards the "beach" by the river and there was the BS, hare, the beer bringer (SJFTom) and a hobo? Upon further inspection, it was simply PMS in her hobo coat by the fire drinking a beer. Our mistake.
The rest of the pack joined us and the hare was again out. Lock Nut spotted a beaver by the fire (an actual beaver, please remove minds from gutter). We took pictures of the hobo and soon left the silt-iness (is this a word?) of the beach area. With an added 10 pounds of wet sand and dirt, we trudged back to circle. A too eager Still Just Fucking Tom dropped the cooler in a hurry to not have to be the one to hoist the hobo back onto solid ground (don't worry, broken foot and all she made it up the mud slide). A restless DMB was caught tying Porono to the tracks, and a few harriettes contemplated who was portrayed in a statue in Frontier Park (I think we decided Lewis and Clark, minus an Indian, plus a dog). At last, back to circle.
With the creation of I Feel Tower's (not present by the way) new rule of circle lasting only as long as the temp, we celebrated by drinking some beer. FRBs (all female) DFLs (all female) and backsliders took part, as well as the hare for laying another shitty trail. However, when thoughts on trail was posed, Pinky responded "No Comment." Eh? What does that mean? This is why we later awarded him hashshit. Since no proper receptacle was present, we used CliffBangHer's (also not present) 100 run mug. Ha! Take that Mardi Gras King! Dewey poked some people with her wienie stick (how can you have a fire on trail and not warn us to bring hot dogs? For future reference I always keep plates, napkins, cups and a wienie stick in my trunk!). After a fairly quick (for Postage anyway) circle, we headed to some bar for more drinking and giant pizzas.
Delicious trail Whiney!
On-Out to Saturday!
Dewey Sexual System


HASH ASH Wednesday

Bring a flash light!  



Near Metro:  NO
Dog/Walker Friendly:  YES


To get there from any where, take your favorite route to I70 WEST, till you cross the MISSOURI River into St. Charles.  Take 5th street to the right (north), which is the first exit after you cross the bridge.  At the second stoplight turn RIGHT (east) onto Boones Lick, which is towards the Historical District.  Continue on Boones Lick a few blocks to the stop sign at Main Street.  Go straight and then a slight right across the tracks and the KATY Trail.  Turn right into the Parking Lot (the whole dam thing is a parking lot over there) and land by the Gazebo.  Look for Hashers and the HASH FLAG.


ON AFTER:  Main Street Bistro - The on after will be at a bar with Cheap ($4) Pitchers and No Food, so I am getting Pizza's from RT Weilers (Great local pizza) set up by the bar owner.  Try to have a clue if you will make it ot the on after by circle time so I can call ahead.  Donations for the pizza can be given to WHINEY at the bar.

In case you get lost or need further direction, contact Bama Mate (618)593-4175.


Big Hump Hash House Harriers - St. Louis, Missouri - Established 1999