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Wednesday 04/25/2007 #619

PMS & Norman Bates - Mismanagement Elections @ Clayton

Hash Trash:

From Miriam-Webster’s On-Line Dictionary
Main Entry: accusate
Pronunciation: ‘a-kyu-zAte
Function: verb
Inflected forms: Accusater, Accusated, Accusating
Etymology: St. Louis region Hash House Harrier, from the Anglo-French accuser, from Latin accusare, to call to account from ad-+ causa lawsuit

transitive verb

1: to charge with fault or offense judicially or by public process, particularly while under the influence of fermented malt beverages that smell like a tackle box.

The hashers gathered in the parking lot of the Tropicana Bowling Alley, as they have done for the past three years for the mis-management election hash.  As this was advertised to be a “jeans” hash, several hashers dressed accordingly.  For those who missed Bama’s wedding, this evening proved that, for the most part, hashers clean up well.  Coppus Rejectus, Help Me I’m Wet, Meta Arsehole, McGutterslut, Have BOB Will Travel, and Ricky’s Crab Shack were a few in the handsome bunch wearing non-hash attire.  It was also good to see Major Backsliders Bathroom Boy, Pi Hole, and Pornogenic milling about.

But this was not to be the “jeans” hash thus advertised; oh, my heavens, no.  Norman Bates and PMS set forth to lay trail that would include a Turkey/Eagle split to accommodate anyone wanting to have a quick r*n before the political business at hand.

It was supposed to be a jeans hash. It was supposed to be about 2 miles long.  So, if the active hashers were only going to be out for say, 25-30 minutes, why not stand around the coolers and drink beer? 

“Two miles? Shit, I can do that in my fucking toe-thongs!” exclaimed Long Duk Dong, as he disappeared around the bowling alley.  He was never heard from again.  It is rumored that he got adopted by Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. in an attempt to patch up their romance.  Several other hashers were spotted on trail that never returned: Postage Tramp, Mother Theresa, Cliffbanger, Ass Backwards, to name a few.  Perhaps they are still following Norman’s trail. 

After leaving PMS to hare for herself, Norman Bates was last spotted by Whiney Bitch at the Mexico border. “Hell, I’m turning around,” Whiney bitched.  That fucker’s crazy, and Any Cock, Licka Good Neighbor, Mudpacker, Gladheateher, and Spoonful are drinking all the beer!”

Four hours had passed.  While most hashers were tragically lost, Follow the Urine Trail returned, looking as if he had seen a ghost.  “Holy Shit, Plot My G-Spot is on a murderous rampage!  She picked up a toad, and when it peed on her, she threw it on the ground and shot it with an AK 47 screaming, ‘die you scum sucking amphibian!’ Then she turned the gun on three bunnies, two squirrels, a chickadee, and a butterfly.  Then she pointed the gun at me!  So I grabbed this “Walk Ins Welcome” sign and ran for my fucking life!”

Circle was short and somber, as the group mourned the loss of so many hashers. 

Just Patrick was awarded his 10 r*n cranium band, christened by Dewey Sexual System in her blue panties.  Hashshit was awarded to Plot My G-Spot.  She was accusated of complaining about the smell of her beer and cruelty to animals.

The mood brightened when Holateral Damage rode in on his bike as the pack moved inside for elections.  The hashers make fast work of 5 giant Pointersaurus pizzas.  Ricky’s Crab Shack was voted best dressed and got a lovely surprise: all his stolen stuff returned to him in a wrapped package.

The results of the elections are as follows.  Congratulations and good luck, wankers.  I’ll let you know if I find Norman.

Respectfully submitted,
Madam Yuk

Grand Master - Cliff BangHer
Co-Grand Master - Purple Muffin Stuffin
Religious Advisor - Postage Tramp
Co-Religious Advisor - Meta Arsehole
Webmeister - Cliff BangHer
Co-Webmeister - Purple Muffin Stuffin
Hare Raiser - Bama Mate
Beermeisters – Meta, FUT, Glady, Lil Spoon, Nurse, Help Me, & Bathroom Boy
Hash Cash - Sexorcist
Backup Hash Cash - Ricky's Crab Shack
Haberdasher - Viper Snatch
Co-Haberdasher - Pees Like A Princess
On-Sec - Plot My G Spot
Hash Flash - Do My Butt
Hash Flash - Pees Like A Princess
Hash Flash - Dewey Sexual System
Hash Harlot: Dewey Sexual System



It'll be a Jeans friendly hash!

We'll be at Tropicana Lanes again this year and we'll have Pointer's Pizza again.

COME OUT TO VOTE!!!!! It's your hasher duty!!!

For a list of Mismanagement positions and who currently holds these positions - Click here
We will be taking self-nominations the night of elections. If you're interested in a position, show up and nominate yourself. If you can't be there but want to run for a position, contact PMS to get your nomination in.

Click here for Map

From the Interchange of I-270 and Highway 40:
Take Highway 40 east to the
Brentwood Blvd exit toward I-170, exit 31. Turn Left onto Brentwood Blvd and proceed .6 miles to Clayton Road. Turn Right onto Clayton Road. Take the first available Right after driving under I-170, at the huge Tropicana Lanes sign. Look for hashers in the parking lot.

Take 64/40 west to the
Clayton Road exit, exit 34B. Proceed on Clayton Road for 2.4 miles and turn left at the huge Tropicana Lanes sign. Look for hashers in the parking lot.

Big Hump Hash House Harriers - St. Louis, Missouri - Established 1999