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Wednesday 02/07/2007 #601

Bama & Sexorcist @ Somewhere near the Brewery (the Big One)

Hash Trash:

I’ve always wondered…are hashers thrifty or just cheap bastards?  As an example let’s look at the attendance for the last two Wednesday’s.  Wednesday 1/31 two notorious FRB’s Whiney Bitch and Cliff Bangher advertise a trail through Sewer Des Peres and warn everyone to bring dry shoes.  Its 20 degree’s with the threat of snow.  BUT they promise special commemorative 600th hash glasses for the first 40 hashers to show up.  Guess what, we get 40 hashers.  Last night its 20 degree’s once again, Sexorsist and Bama Mate have a short trail, an indoor beer stop, dry pavement and the opportunity for an impromptu beer stop and we only get 26 hashers.  Case closed, hashers will run through an open sewer, in the cold and snow for a free beer glass.

We circled up in the park across Broadway from heaven on earth, the AB Brewery.  Between us and the river was NGA the National Geospatial Intelligence Agency, the super secret hush hush global satellite agency, employer of several of our hashers.  With all that spy ware close at hand I’m amazed that the AB police didn’t visit us and confiscate the Pabst that someone brought.  Although it was cold out it didn’t stop Ass Backwards from wearing his usual shorts although he did have an elastic support sleeve on one calf.  The cold also wasn’t enough to prompt Hump Up The Volume to wear long socks.  While we marveled at her bare ankles the real issue was that we were depressed that she wasn’t wearing the stiletto heels from the previous week.    

After chalk talk which included a whichy way and a three way the hares departed and the pack followed after 15 minutes.  The hares laid an arrow around a corner at the end of the block which everyone but Mudpacker and I followed.  We had contracted use of one of the spy satellites from NGA and knew that there was a Check Back at the far end of the block.  Eventually the group returned and followed trail north on Broadway.  Somewhere along Lynch we encountered a check with true trail leading up the hill past the brewery.  Trail continued past the Clydesdale paddock, they were smart enough to be inside where it was warm.  Several streets later we rounded a corner and found the beer stop at Crabby’s.  The bar was expressly chosen for Ricky’s Crab Shack unfortunately he had a Mardi Gras planning meeting and missed the hash.  We thawed out, clothes were shed, pool was played, the breasts hanging from the light fixture were fondled and then they were fondled again and there was much rejoicing.  Once everyone was nicely warmed up we decided it was time to go back outside.  

Within a hundred yards of Crabby’s we found a Hash Halt in front of the Polish Church.  Why the hares needed a Hash Halt so close to the beer stop is beyond me.  Anyway we stood there for a couple of minutes adjusting our multiple layers of clothing and then were on out once again.  We crossed over I-55 into the section of town where the streets are named after states, yikes.  After a relatively short run we found ourselves on Broadway once again.  The bright lights captivated us.  It turned out that the bright lights were from The Brick.  Since we had been forewarned about the possibility of an impromptu beer stop several of us had cash on hand.  We figured that bars are put on this earth for a reason and it would be a crime to pass one by.  Once again clothes came off.  Unfortunately everyone was wearing so many layers it wasn’t all that exciting.  

From The Brick to the end of trail was a short relatively pain free run.  When we arrived back at the park we reconnected with several auto hashers.  The group shivered and held our ice cold beers for warmth while our fashion conscious RA Postage Tramp changed into his evening attire.  While this was entertaining in itself more importantly it earned him Hash Shit although I Wanna Ryder was a close second even though she wasn’t there which was the whole point.  We held an abbreviated version of circle agreeing to finish any open issues at The Brick.  Once there we ordered more beer and continued with significant runs and a naming for Just Jeff.  Given his Asian features we went with our favorite character from the Molly Ringwald movie, Sixteen Candles.  Henceforth and forevermore within the world of hashing he shall be know as Long Duk Dong.  




From IL - Take 55 South to the Arsenal St exit (exit 206).  Follow
east to 2nd St and look for the Hashers.

From 270/40 - Take 40 East to Jefferson Ave (exit 38).  Take Jefferson
to 44 East.  Follow 44 to 55 South (exit 290).  Travel on 55 South to
Arsenal St exit (exit 206).  Follow Arsenal east to 2nd St and look for

Wheelchair/Stroller Friendly - Yes
Dog Friendly - Not unless you want to tie up your pet outside of the
Metro Link Friendly - No


Big Hump Hash House Harriers - St. Louis, Missouri - Established 1999