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Wednesday 04/14/2004 #384

Open @ Brentwood

Hash Trash:

It all started with a beautiful spring evening. The hash gathered outside of Cousin Hugo's ready to run. Just within smelling distance of chicken wings. Close but still a hash to run.

And they're off. Around the softball players, up the hill, and stopped by a train (ingenious way to organize a Hash Halt, Hares!!). When the train passed the hash was faced with a choice - follow the check down a level side track or down the side of the creek, across the water, up the hill, through the woods, over the psycho-man's fence, up a wall, across the parking lot, around the fence, and on with the trail. Shiggy it is!

The last fence was a particular problem for some of the pack. While the fitter hashers slipped through the chain links with little problem, the more horizontally endowed hashers had to vault or squoosh themselves through. Even though he could have slipped around, Porkle received a Stigmata-sized hand wound - not enough to merit the interest of Doctor-On-Trail Just Brian.

Did I mention psycho guy? The DFLs over the fence got to meet and exchange pleasantries with the owner of the Wounding Fence. He was so interested in the hash that he kept following the group in his truck, taking our picture (we waved and smiled), and inquiring about our mothers. Boy, if we ever see him again does he have to drink for autohashing! Finally the DFLs ducked him in a no-autohashing zone and were able to catch up with the group at the beer stop.

After the beer stop the trail was relatively straight and well defined. Challenging and uphill, but straight. There was some dispute over a chick check that a bitch checked out for the guys, but we would prefer not to get into that. The trail ended back in smelling distance of Cousin Huggo's chicken wings.

The circle was eventful. There was something of a cuntspiracy and the beginnings of a new song. Waldo's Pimp (10) and Humptus Interruptus (25) celebrated significant runs. Porkle was renamed for his wounds to "Jeeezus Christ!" [Here's to Jesus Christ, he's true blue... (keep going... there's a punchline eventually)] and Jeeezus Christ was the undisputed winner of the Hashit.

Eventually, the pack disbanded with some hashers going to Cousin Hugo's for some chicken wings and some going elsewhere. All in all, just another shitty trail : )

On On,

Waldo's Pimp



Big Hump Hash House Harriers - St. Louis, Missouri - Established 1999