"I can't run." "Run and drink beer? Don't you get sick?" "I've heard you guys haze."

By this point you've heard every excuse under the sun why your friends won't hash, but at least this time they won't be the only virgin! Tempt your least awful friends, family, and fuckbuddies to come and see what you've been talking about and see for themselves that it's not a cult. We just have secret names, cryptic marks, and rituals, nbd.

Walker and dog friendly, but alas, there will be some not-wheels sections. Get ready for a Miller Lite beer stop, because I love you that much.