Wednesday 04/06/2016 #1320
Greg LooseAnus & Hardly Ever Cums @ ???
Hash Trash: BH4 1320 Hash Trash
It just occurred to me that I was appointed hash scribe for last nights trail. Thanks Gladdy, I owe you one. The rain was done for the day so there was a good crowd. I didn't recognize any of them except maybe Tu Tu Fairy our long-lost CoMo hasher. He was seen earlier that day by many hashers at Pappy's BBQ, which may explain why the hounds seemed a bit slow on trail.
We circled up in a little park on the edge of River Des Peres, the fragrance of fresh sewage tickling our noses. Or maybe it was Disco's Ass that the smell was coming from, IDK. We were introduced to a virgin (Just Danielle?) who looked like she might be 12 or 13. She said $5 made her cum but I didn't believe it. Then our hares gave a drunken chalk talk. None of it made sense and there was blue marking chalk, which we all know is SO easy to see at night. The hares left and Gladdy led us in a lovely rendition of "I used to work in Chicago in a department store".
Soon we were on out and the runners trail was loaded with hash halts! Really Greg? You had a 15 minute cranium start and you laid a 1 mile trail and you thought you needed a hash halt every block?!?! Shitty trail!! We arrived at a shot stop about 2 houses from the beer stop. Shitty trail! The runners were at the beer stop for so long that we ran out of beer. The walkers showed up hours later. Turns out, Hardly Ever Cums decided the walkers needed to do a half marathon. And since the beer stop was at her house, she had to raid her fridge to find beer for the walkers. Shitty trail!
Miraculously, everyone made it back to Circle. The usual suspects were awarded down-downs. $5 & 59 were probably FRBs. (I don't remember but it seems reasonable) I was a DFL despite beating the walkers to the beer stop by an hour or 2. Gladdy called a lot of other crap that I don't remember. Then Just Dani regaled us with a "Yo mama so fat" joke that stunk so bad I forgot it. Or maybe it was, "yo mama so fat she iron her pants on the driveway", or "yo mama so fat her belt size is equator", or "yo mama so fat she use a swimming pool for a cereal bowl", or "yo mama so fat she gave Dracula diabetes", or "yo mama so fat all she wants for Christmas is to see her feet", or "yo mama so fat even Dora couldn't explore her".
Big Hump Hash House Harriers - St. Louis, Missouri - Established 1999