Nobody has written the Hash Trash yet...WHY ARE WE WAITING!?!?!
I--the royal we, you know, the editorial--I dropped off the money, exactly as per--Look, man I've got certain information alright? Certain things have come to light, and uh, ya know, has it ever occurred to you, that uh, instead of uh, you know running around, uh uh, blaming me, given the nature of all this new shit, you know it, it it, this could be a uh, a lot more uh, uh, uh, uh, complex, I mean it's not just, it might not be, just such a simple, uh--you know?
What in God's holy name are you blathering about?
Yes, what am I blathering on about? The Lebowski Hash, thats what. Never been? Well, what the hell is wrong with you?! Join Dewey Sexual System and GladHeAteHer for the 4th edition of a trail that should probably never take place in the middle of the week. Why was it moved to Wednesdays? Well, you see, Saturday, Donny, is Shabbos, the Jewish day of rest. That means that I don't work, I don't drive a car, I don't fucking ride in a car, I don't handle money, I don't turn on the oven, and I sure as shit don't fucking hash!
Remember that time Lazy Ass came dressed as Lebowski? Or when I Feel Tower came dressed as an extra from Saving Private Ryan because he never saw the film? Or when a visitor (at the time) named Speed Wanker showed up in a full Walter costume that he just happened to have with him? Or when Dewey peed on the rug? There is a reason this hash only happens once every 22 months!
Meet in Maplewood, in the big parking lot behind Boogaloo and the Crow's Nest.
On-After will be at Saratoga Lanes, upstairs. We may need a few guys to get Lazy up there.
Things to expect (but should probably not expect): white Russians, trivia, costume contest, scavenger hunt, ringer toss, and marmot crossings.
Things you may need: a costume, some Lactaid, bowling shoes, a rug (to tie the room together), and $7.
And remember, the Dude abides. I dont know about you, but I take comfort in that.