Start: Global Foods Parking Lot,
421 N. Kirkwood Rd.,
Kirkwood, MO, 63122

Your resident midgets present you with a SHORT TRAIL. Come enjoy what these pint-sized harriettes have to offer.
Fleshlights are recommended!
You might want to bring a FLASHLIGHT and a CHANGE OF SHOES, water wings, goggles, change of clothes, rope, cleats and a swiss army knife.

D'erections:

Eville (IL): Merge onto I-270 W via the ramp to St Charles. Take exit 7A for I-255 S. Keep left at the fork to continue toward I-255 S and merge onto I-255 S. Take exit 25B to merge onto I-55 S/I-70 W. Continue to follow I-55 S. Entering Missouri. Take exit 40C to merge onto I-55 S toward Tulsa/Memphis/I-44 W. Continue on I-44 W. Take exit 277B for US-67 N/US-61 N. Make a right onto S Kirkwood Rd/US-61/US-67. Global Foods will be on your left, look for hashers around the back.

BelleVegas (IL): Merge onto SR-15. Merge onto I-255 S via the ramp to Memphis. Entering Missouri. Continue on I-270 N. Take exit 5A for State Hwy 366 E/US-50 E/Watson Rd/I-44 E toward St Louis. Continue toward I-44 E/US-50 E. Keep left at the fork, follow signs for US-50/St Louis/I-44 and merge onto I-44 E/US-50 E. Take exit 277B for US-67 N/US-61 N. Turn left at S Kirkwood Rd/US-50/US-61/US-67. Continue to follow S Kirkwood Rd/US-61/US-67. Global Foods will be on your left, look for hashers around the back.

North St. Louis (Florissant): Head west on US-67 toward Rue St Charles St. Take the ramp to I-270 W. Keep left at the fork, follow signs for I-270 W/Dunn Rd/Lynn Haven. Keep left at the fork to continue toward I-270 W. Keep right at the fork, follow signs for I-270 W and merge onto I-270 W. Take exit 9 for State Hwy 100 E/Manchester Rd. Merge onto Manchester Rd/MO-100. Turn right at N Kirkwood Rd/US-61/US-67. Global Foods will be on your right, look for hashers around the back.

South St. Louis (Sunset Hills): Turn left at S Lindbergh Blvd/US-50/US-61/US-67. Global Foods will be on your left, look for hashers around the back.

West St. Louis (St. Charles): Take the ramp to I-70 E/St Louis. Merge onto I-70 E. Take exit 232A-B to merge onto I-270 S toward Memphis. Take exit 9 for State Hwy 100 E/Manchester Rd. Merge onto Manchester Rd/MO-100. Turn right at N Kirkwood Rd/US-61/US-67. Global Foods will be on your right, look for hashers around the back.

Downtown St. Louis: Take the ramp onto I-55 S. Continue on I-44 W. Take exit 277B for US-67 N/US-61 N. Make a right onto S Kirkwood Rd/US-61/US-67. Global Foods will be on your left, look for hashers around the back.