A long time ago, in a thread far far away, a visitor requested "an extra shitty trail." The compulsion to oblige this request in the most literal way possible was too much for me to resist. So, we're all going to go on a nice little adventure in the bottom lands of the majestic Meramec River. My original inspiration was to make it a total mud fest, but Mother Nature has decided to give us heaping spoonful of winter. With 4-8" of snow expected this weekend, followed by temperatures staying just below freezing, it's going to be a real wonderland of misery out there, but probably not as muddy as I hoped.
To head off any pissing and moaning, or at least prepare you for a healthy dose of I-told-you-so, I'm gonna break this trail down like a fraction for you all:
1. This is all Responsibilibitch's fault.
2. It'll be about 5 miles, all-in. There MAY be a turkey/eagle split.
3. You will need a change of clothes. All of it.
4. Gloves are a good idea.
5. Cranium lamp for sure.
6. You will become familiar with the topography of the area. Think of it as a metaphor for life, with its ups and downs, shitty situations, and wide open stretches.
7. Your little feetsies are going to get wet, so just be ready for that. If you keep moving, your feet will be fine.
8. No walker trail. No disclosing of the beer stop. You'll have to earn your stories.
9. Our species conquered every climate on the planet with pelts, sticks, and animal bones. There's a little hard-ass within all of your soft, delicate, modern shells. Let's let it out for an evening!
10. It's rarely as bad as it sounded at first.
Parking lot northwest of 026 Bar and Grill
519 Main St
Fenton, MO 63026
026 Bar and Grill
515 Gravois Rd.
Fenton, MO 63026